Flo's rationale made sense to me (General Discussion)

by slyster, Wednesday, October 09, 2019, 3:07PM (13 days ago)

Today Flo said she wanted to help her aunt. Then she said she & her mom were estranged from that side of the family & she hoped that if she could donate her kidney & do something good for her family it would not necessarily lead them to forgive her, but said "maybe I could start to forgive myself".

That hit home with me. Wonder if any of you have felt the same way? When I was in my teens & 20s I was a very different person than I am today. Hurt a LOT of people I loved, some were unintentional, some as a consequence of the lifestyle I led then, others just because I didn't value what I had. Later, when I straightened out I was able to mend relationships, be there for family members in need, and as a consequence I gradually learned to forgive myself for the mess my life had once become & how I hurt my family.

So I "get" Flo in that respect & also for her wanting to be anonymous.

Flo's rationale made sense to me

by krort @, Wednesday, October 09, 2019, 3:10PM (13 days ago) @ slyster

I hope it turned around things for you.


There are always life lessons we can always learn.

Wanda

Flo's rationale made sense to me

by q, Wednesday, October 09, 2019, 3:16PM (13 days ago) @ slyster

Today Flo said she wanted to help her aunt. Then she said she & her mom were estranged from that side of the family & she hoped that if she could donate her kidney & do something good for her family it would not necessarily lead them to forgive her, but said "maybe I could start to forgive myself".

That hit home with me. Wonder if any of you have felt the same way? When I was in my teens & 20s I was a very different person than I am today. Hurt a LOT of people I loved, some were unintentional, some as a consequence of the lifestyle I led then, others just because I didn't value what I had. Later, when I straightened out I was able to mend relationships, be there for family members in need, and as a consequence I gradually learned to forgive myself for the mess my life had once become & how I hurt my family.

So I "get" Flo in that respect & also for her wanting to be anonymous.

I know exactly what you're talking about. That happened to an uncle of mine. The hurt he caused his mother and others almost killed her. Then he met a wonderful woman and he became a different man. Successful at work, nice home and beautiful children. He was the first in the family to help others. Right before he died so many that he hurt were there for him. He was at peace knowing he was forgiven.

Happy for you. Keep it up!

Flo's rationale made sense to me

by Kammie, Wednesday, October 09, 2019, 3:17PM (13 days ago) @ slyster

I think forgiving ourselves is one of the hardest things we can do for us. I know that there is something that happened in my life that I do struggle with forgiving me. I know that there was not much I could have done about it and I was not at fault, but still it is easy to slip back into thinking that it was my fault.

Flo's rationale made sense to me

by GracieGirl, Wednesday, October 09, 2019, 7:47PM (13 days ago) @ slyster

We all have hurt people and been hurt but this baby napping thing would be even harder to get over in real life. I have had relatives to steal from me, lie on me, lie to me, but I can’t imagine learning that a relative knew your baby wasn’t dead and took 50k for it. Families have lied about people’s parents like your sister is actually your mother. Your father is a married man across time who refuses to have anything to do with you. All that hurts, but a baby napping is in a whole different level, but I agree that forgiving ourselves is very difficult. Just the shame and guilt of hurting another person. I always say God thank for grace because I don’t know where I would be without it.

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